Reading Time: 4 Minutes
The air around me is still, as if it’s just now decided the change of season is upon us and it’s stepping gently into winter, so as not to disturb it too much.
The lake is quiet, more frozen in some places than others; circles of near-ice growing smaller each day.
A small group of seagulls land in the middle for a moment, cutting the still. Eight, maybe nine of them, they aren’t there long enough for me to count them.
It’s cold out on the lake today.
The still and the quiet.
I hadn’t realized how much I’ve been needing these things.
We were in Mexico just two weeks ago, the kind of fly’n’flop vacation we used to mock, but one that was sorely needed.
After purchasing this lake house in the spring, and moving apartments in the city in the fall, 2025 has filled us to the brim with planning, logistics and, at times, sheer chaos. The lack of structure and routine was freeing at first, but quickly became its own burden as every day threw something new at us.
Moving house is consistently ranked third in life’s stressors, right behind death of a loved one and divorce, and we moved twice this year. It’s not quite the end of the year yet, but I already find myself reflecting on just how much we accomplished.
There were definite times of relaxation and fun – our friend group and family helped make our first summer up here one of the most memorable in all my life – but there were not many moments where we got to be still.
After a hectic fall at work, two days before Mexico I got food poisoning. I have never been so depleted heading into a vacation. I literally crawled into our room after a long travel day and was immediately sick.
But the next day was better, and the next better, and we had a vacation where we did nothing but recharge our batteries. No adventures, no leaving the resort… I finished the book I started reading in January. It was a vacation where there were many moments of quiet joy, but as comfortable as we were and as great as the resort was, it was not the comfort of home, and with all the activity of resort life, there was not a lot of opportunity to just be… still.
Even the spa, a respite from resort life, was filled with moments of large iguanas attacking sandwiches and surprise wedding groups using the area for their photos.
Mexico was everything we needed it to be, but after being back for just two days, the chaos returned and the battery seemed to drain even more quickly than it had before we’d gone away.
Maybe we’ve reached the age where it’s not enough to recharge the batteries, maybe it’s time we replace them all together?
I think this lake house is step one towards that.
We can’t afford this place.
Well, we can scrape by, but part of the whole plan is very reliant on us turning a profit on Air BNB rentals when we aren’t here.
So, in addition to moving twice, we also launched our host business on the platform.
Nothing disrupts stillness like a side gig.
The apartment move in Toronto was, in part, designed to reduce my commute and drive times and give me some hours back each day. While that part has been successful, the number of trips up to the cottage in the last six weeks has just shifted the time into larger chunks as we tackle the upkeep and maintenance needed before and after each rental.
I am thankful and we’ve been blessed that we’ve had three bookings in the last five weeks, all complete with five star and beautifully written reviews. The income has been helpful for sure, but it’s the comments we’re getting that make us realize how happy we are to be able to give such a positive experience to others after renting up here in the area ourselves for the last decade.
Who would have thought that all those years of family cottage rentals were actually research and practice for us to flip it into a successful business?
We’ve closed ourselves to rentals now until December 29th and the minute we did so our shoulders lowered.
This place could be ours again. Our stuff out of the closets, our food back in the pantry.
I can make a mess and know that when I clean it up I can do a job that’s good enough, not one that needs to make the counter squeak.
For the next month I don’t have to worry about finishing work at five, getting up here before ten to tend to the hot tub before a surprise rental, then setting the alarm for three so I can make it back to the city by six for work the next day.
We’ll get to a space where we’ll have local support, but these first few rentals are so crucial that we’ve taken the responsibility on ourselves, both to ensure we’re doing it right, but also so that we get a sense of exactly what we need to ask others to do for us.
It’s been six months of new for us, and I’m ready for the new to feel old.
Those stressors I mentioned earlier, and that first one, death of a loved one? That’s what we’ve been dealing with this week.
The last few days have been hard, harder for others for sure, but also difficult when you’re mostly in a supporting role and you’re not sure how best you can support.
All you can do is let those closest know you’re there for them, and then also try to find your own time to grieve.
I actually got more than four hours sleep last night, so that’s a start.
My work knows what’s happening, and I’ve needed today to just get myself back on track. I’m grateful to have the support of such amazing colleagues.
And so that’s what has me out here, cozy on the porch that has already given us so many memories, working through my emotions and thoughts as I always have, by writing about them.
I’m already feeling more sane than I have in months.
Noticing that my last blog entry was back in March, it’s evident that no matter how busy life gets, I need to carve more time out to write.
That also has to be a part of the new battery plan moving forward.
The seagulls are back, chattering, but settling down.
Twenty-eight of them, maybe more. The trees are blocking some of my view, but I’m not going to get up.
Don’t mind the grainy-grey photo, it’s more for me to mark a moment than anything.
As now I’m going to close the laptop for awhile and just watch them.
And be still, just for a few moments, myself.
